One of the things my clients struggle with is how to address the invitations we’ve so painstakingly created together. I provide an easy-to-use spreadsheet to assist in the process, but as you enter the names in whatever program you use, think about how you want the envelopes addressed. The primary question you need to answer is: Is your event formal or casual? The answer to this question will determine how you should address the invitations.
Here are some examples:
FORMAL
If married, use titles followed by husband’s first and last name:
Mr. and Mrs. John Doe
If the husband is a Doctor or other official, replace the generic “Mr.” with his title:
Dr. and Mrs. John Doe
Judge and Mrs. John Doe
If the wife is a Doctor or other official, replace the “Mrs.” with her title and include her first name:
Mr. John and Dr. Jane Doe
Mr. John and Honorable Jane Doe
If two adults are living together but are not married, list their names separately, with the woman’s name first:
Ms. Jane Smith and Mr. John Doe
If you are addressing the invitation to a single adult woman:
Ms. Jane Doe
If you are addressing the invitation to a single adult man:
Mr. John Doe
If you are addressing the invitation to a family with minor children:
Mr. and Mrs. John Doe
Master Jason and Miss Melinda Doe
If a parent and an adult child are living together, they would be listed on separate lines so as not to infer they are married:
Ms. Jane Doe
Mr. Jason Doe
CASUAL
If married, use the wife’s and husband’s first names, with wife listed first, so that husband’s name is not separated from his last name:
Jane and John Doe
If two adults are living together, list names separately:
Jane Smith and John Doe
If you are addressing the invitation to a single adult female:
Jane Doe
If you are addressing the invitation to a single adult male:
John Doe
If you are addressing the invitation to a family with minor children:
Jane and John Doe
Jason and Melinda (it’s OK to just list first names of children)
If a parent and an adult child are living together, they would be listed on separate lines so as not to infer they are married:
Jane Doe
Jason Doe
One thing to remember is that these examples are just that: examples. What I would recommend to you if you were my client is to do what makes you most comfortable. The invitation sets the tone for the event, but part of setting the tone includes reflecting your personal style in how the invitations are addressed.